Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Humiliation or Honour?

I believe.. that today, is one of the lowest level i've reach in my whole university life.. how do i put it..

"It all started in one fine day..."

.. would be how i would want to start the story... BUT... this start would be more appropriate..

"I've never liked Wednesday, maybe because of the weather, or perhaps the people i am going to meet on this particular day (i guess the latter is more of the choice..). Having an average sleep of less than 4-5 hours a day for continuous 1-2 weeks, i guess the last thing i want to experience is mental torture, which i will have to face in the coming several hours.

Sally (modified name to cover the REAL identity) is one of the names that had been deeply engraved into every minds of Fin students, aside from their high-school-dictator-like discipline teacher or the first kindergarten teacher who lash them with the ever-fearsome tool of punishment: 'the ROTAN'. Perhaps the most fearsome attribute which leads to such scenario is because as the discipline monters of high school and first kiddie whipper, *Sally scars most of us in a more unimaginable way.. emotionally and mentally..

Being in her class is as scary as being thrown into lion's den, not knowing when we will be torn apart and if we are to be, we will not know how she will do so. The only person who would know what she is thinking, may be her twin sister.. Yllas, the alter-evil-ego. Anyways, In normal times, she may present a sweet looking feature, but to much of a disappointment, it has always been the opposite.

* Not to start ranting on how we are being mistreated in her class, but i guess, this is perhaps the only way i can get it out of my system..

Anyway, as students are grouped in a team of 4-5 members, we are to present a case study on the subject. Given the topic for the day, i was really disappointed in the way she selected the members for me. I asked myself, 'did i just said or did anything wrong that she could do such a thing to me?' The thing is, having seen several groups before me, i see the members that she assigns are well capable, or MORE than capable, but for me, its like *sighs.. speechless.. i would rather rest my case.

As the progress started, i felt that it is not that bad after all. What lacked i guess are the ability to convey the messages that we squeezed out of our cerebelums, to let the feisty dictator understand. Very best have i tried to help out my members and in the end of the day, with relief, i thought, we have worked out well with our case study presentation.

NEVER EVER EXPECT SOMETHING BEFRE IT HAPPENS, AS THINGS HAPPEN IN THE MOST UNEXPECTED WAY.

Fast forwarding straight to the end of the show, i have to say though it was disappointing, i was satisfied. Why? Everyone is working their ass off and tried their best, so minus the language, everything seemed like a success. But what hits me was how badly she stepped on my members, 'Hey, people have dignity, so do you. If you go to India and you speak sh*t would you expect the Indians to say "i dun understand a single sh*t thing you are saying.." right? Those Chinamen are not stupid clueless because looked as if they did nothing and because of how they talked gibberish during the presentation, in fact, they may know more than you may think.. I feel the cut for my men, though fallen, but for me, they fell in an honourable way.

I guess, things can be worse than this, so thank goodness its over... Look at the bright side.. at least i was labelled as the 'superstar' of the team, so heck.. maybe that would be the highlight of the day..

This doesn't help either:
Mark: "i heard about your *class (concealed to protect a significant someone's name, and my ass). I would like to offer my deepest condolences to your now f*rked up defunct group but take heart in knowing that you did your best and that *Sally will always be... *Sally. If you've shown your effort, you shouldn't be afraid of your internal.."

Me: "haha.. what the f*rk..."

And hey, my sad-boots have been laying motionless for more than 3 days.. they are telling me that they need to go and have some fun... so do i...

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